Deep thoughts by Todd

O.k. I have to say that I knew that deep questions about our faith and God would come; however, I did not think 5 would be that magical age. I understand my faith on an adult level, but was not prepared to explain some deep ideas to a 5 year old. I had not spent great time seeking for God's wisdom in this area yet! Here is a conversation that occurred between me and Todd yesterday. This all happened in under 10 minutes.

Todd: Mommy, how does God hold up the sun and not burn his hand?
Me: Well, he does not hold it in his hand. He placed it there and it stays.
T: How did he do that?
M: Well, He is God and can do many things that we can't do.
T: Well, I've wondered how he can make something out of nothing. Why can't I do that?
M: Yeah, he did make the sun out of nothing, but we can't because He is God and he can do things we can't do.
T: So, he made the whole world the same way?
M: Yes, that's right.
T: Is God a boy?
M: What do you think?
T: Yes, he is a boy.
M: That's right.
T: What about that other thing?
M: (I knew he meant the Holy Spirit.) I think you mean Jesus.
T: Um, I think...
M: No, you mean Jesus. (I did not want to get into the Holy Spirit any more than we already have. I knew they idea of a spirit living in us would scare him).
T: Yeah, I guess.
M: Yeah, He is a boy.
T: How can God live in us and in Heaven?
M: (I am thinking can we take any longer to get to Grandma's house. How long will these questions go?) Well, His body doesn't really live in our body. His body is in Heaven but he lives in our heart.
T: What do you mean He lives in our heart?
M: Well, we know he is there in our heart because we can feel Him. We know he loves us and we can feel His love in our heart.
T: Oh, yeah I can feel that.
M: Good, it feels nice doesn't it?
T: Yeah. Hey, what can we do that God can do?
M: Nothing, really because no one is like Him. He is so special. That is why we want to always love Him and obey Him because He does things we can't.
T: Yeah, like heal sick people. If we pray to someone else, they can't heal me, but God can.
M: Yep, your right. Well, look Todd, we just pulled up to Grandma and Grandpa's. (Thank goodness. I need to pray for wisdom on answering a 5 year old's questions on the Holy Spirit)

There you have it. I was in awe of his knowledge and curiosity. Perhaps we should all be that hungry for the understanding of our Lord. It was another realization of the important job we have as parents to help our children develop their on faith and belief in God. I guess I will be ready next time!

In the past

I was tagged by my friend, Jeni. I am supposed to write what I was doing 10, 20, and 30 years ago. So here we go:

10 years ago: I was married to Brad even though I was only 21. We had been married 4 months. I was in my junior year of school. I was deep in my major of elementary education. Brad was working many hours at Footlocker counting down the days until I graduated and he could get a job in his actual major. He was determined that I would be able to graduate from Harding.


20 years ago: I would have just turned 11 years old. I was in 4th grade. I was living in Flower Mound, Texas. I was in Mrs. Tweedy's class. She was one of my favorite teachers ever. I was in a class with a lot of special education children. I guess I was already in training for my future job. Those kids would listen to me when they wouldn't listen to the teacher.


30 years ago: I had just turned one. I was really cute. I was good since I had not hit my terrible 2's. I was a happy little baby.

What

I just realized that I must have been really tired last night when I wrote that blog. There were misspelled words and mis-typed word like crazy. I am really not that dumb.

The Touch

I have been doing a study called "Fingerprints of God" by Jennifer Rothschild. I actually started it a long time ago and had quit because of VBS. It got misplaced and I uncovered it last week. It is a really good daily study. It is not a long daily study, but it has some good thoughts. The premise is that we are made uniquely by God and he desires us to know Him like He knows us. On Monday, the session was about the woman at the well in John 4:3-10. The author was saying that not all of us get to see God through a burning bush or a talking donkey but that God reveals Himself to each of us individually. Rothschild went on to say that "Sometimes our plans and longings get in the way and they only serve to blur our view, keeping us from recognizing God's presence in our most ordinary moments". Wow! That is so true for me in my life. That was a comment that hit home to me. However, the most amazing thing was what was suggested to do at the end of that day's study. The author suggest praying to God and asking Him to reveal Himself to me in the next 3 days as He touches me in my ordinary life. I have prayed to feel God's presence before but never in a time frame like this. Let me just tell you, that was an amazing time in prayer for me. I truly felt connected and I prayed an earnest prayer. I am sure with a specific time frame I was more in tune to His leading. It was yesterday that God revealed Himself to me. It was in the form of a touch from a child. It was so evident that this child, though by earthly standards was lost, was a subtle reminder of my Lord and His plan for me. As of November, I will now be a full time teacher in a class that is a true calling. It is one that the scenario is awkward and the situations difficult, but one that I will embrace. It is one that God has called me to and it was all because I was ready for Him to truly lead my life. I would like to challenge each of you to ask God to reveal Himself, but be prepared, it might make you step out of your comfort zone, but if you truly believe in Him, it will seem like a much easier decision.

Memories

One of my good friends birthday is on October 15th. So, in honor of her, I dug up so old photos of the good days of high school. Many of my friends have blogs, facebook, or myspace accounts. I am so glad because it allows me to keep in touch. The girls in these pictures were what helped me to develop into who I am today! Thanks girls. I miss your friendships and the good days of laughing and being immature. Now we are responsible moms. Crazy stuff! For those of you that know me now, I had a perm in some of these years. What was I thinking?

This is a group of us at Winterfest either our soph. or Jr. year. I chose this one because the couple on the left are married with 3 children. We always knew they would stay together! He was also a good friend of mine.

This is us in our Sr. year. We were all in chorus and this was our terrible dresses! This was all of my good female friends!
Again, this is our Sr. year. We were on a chorus trip and had decided to play on the McDonald's playground. I am on the far left.

This is a us at our Jr./Sr. formal.

Thanks for the memories Rebecca, Erika, and Kristin. It was a lot of fun.

Cinderella Days

I have not seen this movie in a while. However, today I gained more respect for Cinderella. I scrubbed my kitchen/eat-in area floors with a small brush. You might wonder why. Well, when we bought our house 3 years ago, we picked out a flooring that was durable, cheaper, and would help disguise dirt. What we didn't think about was the fact that this flooring was VERY porous. Of course it hides dirt well because it seeps into the pores and make the entire floor look nasty. So, after putting this off long enough, I got down on my knees and for about 5 hours I scrubbed. My hands are about to fall off but the floor looks so much cleaner. Now, I have mopped it consistently but it just did not get all of the dirt out of the pores. So, I decided to post a picture that shows the difference between the cleaned floor and the dirty floor. Just remember, I really do keep them mopped, just not scrubbed. The clean floor is on the right and the dirty floor is on the left. Notice how much lighter they are when they are cleaned. You can see the dirt in the pores. GROSS!

Now some of you might wonder what Todd was doing during my cleaning. Well, I have included a few pictures to show what he did while I was being Cinderella.

He also played Scooby Doo with me,

He played cars, he played trains, and he played with the McDonald's food. Oh, and he watched Scooby Doo, too. Come to thank of it, no wonder he had to rest!



Luckily, my Cinderella days are few and far between. Tomorrow we are off to a pumpkin patch. Perhaps my carriage will be waiting!

Tagged

Okay, Kristin, a very dear friend of mine from high school, has tagged me about my man. Here we go:

1. Who is my man? Brad
2. How long have we been together? We have been married 10 years
3. How long did we date? We dated 1 years and were engaged 1year .
4. How old is he? 34
5. Who eats more? He does.
6. Who said "I love you" first? He did.
7. Who is taller? He is.
8. Who sings better? I do.
9. Who is smarter? I really do not know. We are probably have about the same IQ.
10. Who has more of a temper? Mine. He is very laid-back!
11. Who does the laundry? I do most of the time. He will do it if I am busy!
12. Who takes out the trash? He does.
13. Who has sharper computer skills? He does.
14. Who sleeps on the right side? He does.
15. Who pays bills? I do.
16. Who mows the lawn? He does usually. When he was traveling to Chicago, I did.
17. Who cooks? I do however not as much as I should.
18. Who drives when we are together? He does.
19. Who pays when we are out together? He does.
20. Who is more stubborn? Does Todd count? If not, me.
21. Who is first to admit it when they are wrong? Brad
22. Who asked out who? Brad asked me. Funny story. I will have to post that sometime.
23. Who kissed who first? Brad kissed me first.
24. Who is more sensitive? Me by far.
25. Who has more friends? We are about the same. Most of our friends are at church.
26. Who has more siblings? He does. He has 2 half brothers. I have one brother.
27. Who wears the pants? He does but we discuss things. I guess we sort-of share but he is our spiritual leader!
Now, I will tag the three people: Tracy, Becky, and Jeni.

Be Still

I was called to study the passage in Psalm 37:7 the other night. I had prayed that I would be lea to the scripture that I needed to study. This is what I read.

Quiet down before God, be prayerful before him. Don't bother with those who climb the ladder, who elbow their way to the top.

Now the second part was not too impacting. However, the words that really drew me in was "Quiet down" or "Be still". Then I was drawn to Psalm 46:10. This passage is one I have read a million times, but I really read it and thought on it this time.

Be still, and know that I am God; I will be exalted among the nations, I will be exalted in the earth.

It was then that I was lead to a common story. A lesson that I have taught in children's classes and one that I have heard many lessons on in my lifetime. However, it spoke to me in a deeper way than I can even put into words. It was the scripture in Mark 4:38-40.

38Jesus was in the stern, sleeping on a cushion. The disciples woke him and said to him, "Teacher, don't you care if we drown?"
39He got up, rebuked the wind and said to the waves, "Quiet! Be still!" Then the wind died down and it was completely calm.
40He said to his disciples, "Why are you so afraid? Do you still have no faith?"

After reading this, I felt a feeling like I had not felt in quite some time. A feeling of comfort and peace. I could feel myself saying to God, "Lord, why me. Don't you care. I feel like I am drowning in life and do you just sit and watch?" It was then that I heard my Lord whisper to me, "Carrie, be still and be calm. Why are you afraid. Do you still have no faith?" Wow. I was opened to my true self. Why do I question. Why do I wonder if He is present. The same God that watches over me was willing to give His only son for me. Of course he cares! Of course he is there waiting for me.

I realized I have been running. I have been busy so that I do not have to deal with the hurt I have faced. I have been fearful of what trial I would endure next. Sad to say, my prayers have been guarded. Sure I have prayed faithfully but not openly. I have been awaken by the words of these scriptures. I have been told to be still. That is hard. I will leave with these words from a song that allowed me to make it through the loss of our precious baby girl. I sang this song many times with tears flowing from my eyes. I suppose it will always have a big place in my heart. I wished I was an artist. I would draw a picture of my Lord with a hand holding numerous tears. In each tear, would be words or names of things that I have cried over. Some are so insignificant. Others shook my faith but did not keep me down. This is a part of the song by Casting Crowns, " Praise You in this Storm".

And I'll praise you in this storm and i will lift my hands that you are who you are no matter where I am and every tear I've cried you hold in your hand you never left my side and though my heart is torn I will praise you in this storm

Update

Well, it has been a while since I have posted anything. Several of you have asked how things are going. Well, Brad had been offered a position a week ago but it was back in mortgage and was full commission. UGH! We had decided that he would wait until yesterday and if he did not have any other option, he would take that job. I really did not want him to have to work in a job he hated. Work is bad enough but if you HATE it, it is worse. However, on Friday, he received a call from his old boss saying he was trying to get him on with him. It would be doing what he loved (project manager coordinator) and it would be in town! So, yesterday Brad received an offer to work as an outsource for HCA a huge medical company here in town. He is so relieved and so am I! God is good you just have to sit back and wait for His timing. Also, I have been offered a full time position at the school where I have been subbing. We are on a 2 week Fall Break. I will make that decision when we return to school. I do not know enough about the position. I do know it is a self-contained special education class. I do not know the severity or the conditions. I will have to talk to the teacher. So, that is what is going on in our household. We are busy but are blessed to see God's work in our lives. Thanks for all of your prayers. This has been a difficult time for us. I am looking forward to some stability and sanity again! I pray that we can have a little breather before we are under trials again.