The Gifts

As many of you know, Brad and I have wanted another baby for 4 years. After many heartbreaking months and a miscarriage, we discovered we would be blessed with another baby. This Christmas has been different for me. I have to say that I am 100% content. A few days ago, I was looking at a tree that has plenty of presents under it and was reminded of my precious gifts. These gifts are irreplaceable and are my life wrapped in adorable skins. They are my biggest joy! As I looked at Jackson tonight, his innocence reminded of several things..
1). God has blessed me with 2 amazing sons. I pray that I can teach them to love and cherish our Heavenly Father.
2). I reminded of the awesome sacrifice that God gave up for each one of us. The thought of having to witness either one of my sons going through what Jesus endured is beyond my comprehension! There is NO ONE that is worth their lives.. much less a stranger.
3). I am ever more thankful for His sacrifice and the true meaning of Christmas.

I do not know if I will write again before Christmas, if not, I wish you all a merry Christmas. I pray that we all have safe travels, priceless times with family, and a true focus on what Jesus did for us!

Santa

This is our Santa picture this year. I am so excited that Jackson was actually awake! I hope you all have a wonderful Christmas and take time to reflect on our Savior.

Bath time

I was looking at old picture tonight. The top picture is Todd and the bottom one is Jackson. They are very similar in age. Do you think they look alike or different?

So very different

Todd at about 3 1/2 months old.

Jackson at 2 months old.

As you can see, Todd was a pacifier kid. He loved it and depended on it. Jackson comes along and he is going to be a thumb sucker. We have tried pacifiers and he does not like them. He works so hard to get that thumb in his mouth. In the last few days, he has gotten good at it.

I have mixed emotions about the thumb sucking. I do not have to keep up with it and worry about him dropping it during the night. However, I fear the day we have to break him from it. We can't just put it up and take it away. It looks like we have no choice.

2 months

It is hard to believe that Jackson is 2 months old! Time is going so fast. I wished I could slow it down. I look at Todd and realize just how fast life is moving.

Jackson is doing much better. He now sleeps at night at least 4 hours straight. He is so much fun. He has begun to coo and smiles a lot. He is much happier now that he is not having problems with formula. He has had a bad stomach virus, though. He lost some weight and actually had blood in his stool yesterday (microscopically). We are having to watch him because this can mean he is still having problems with his formula. If that is the case, we have to move to prescription formula that can only be ordered form the manufacturer. It will cost $80 a week. Please pray that this is not the case. That would be a car payment a month. I guess it is good that we just paid our car off!!

He was 22 1/4 "and 11lbs 13 oz

Smile

Jackson is really starting to smile and coo. I just love all of those sounds. We finally got a good smiling picture. He will smile even bigger, but this will give you an idea of how cute he is smiling!

Thanksgiving

I always love Thanksgiving. It is not the food. To be quite honest most of your typical Thanksgiving food is not my favorite. I just love the thought behind Thanksgiving: pondering our blessings and spending time with family.

This year we were at my parent's house. We all got together for lunch and did not leave until after 8:00 that night. We just spent the day enjoying family and letting all of the boys play.

I hope you all had as great of a day as I did!

All fo the boys dressed up as soemthing different. We had a pilgrim, indian, turkey, and pumpkin. Jackson was not going to be left out!

I'm thankful for...

I have really been bothered lately about the state of our country right now. There is so much negativity. I find myself worried at times and then refocus on the fact that God is in control and he has given me promises for a better life one day! It was because of these worries that I decided to come up with 32 (that is how old I am) things I am thankful for. I wanted to get myself focused on the great blessing He has given me. I know this is a little early but I wanted to have plenty of time to truly focus on Him and these blessings.

These are in no particular order and some are major blessings and others are not..
1). The Grace that my Heavenly Father has given me- For without it, life would be hopeless!
2). My spiritual heritage- I have a strong family of believers that has helped pave the way for me and my family.
3). My parents- God blessed me with AMAZING parents that have supported me in so many ways. I love you both!
4). My brother- I have always looked up to him. He has been my entertainment, my leader, my teacher, my best friend, my confidant, and my example for many years and will always be. I love you!
5). My sister-in-law- She has been a good fit for our family! We have shared many things through the raising of our boys. I am blessed to have her since I never had a sister. I love you!
6). My husband- God gave me the perfect match for me. We have laughed, cried, been silly, struggled, and worshipped together for 11 years. He is my support and our provider. He allowed me to fulfill a dream- have children and stay at home and raise them. He is a true spiritual leader for us. I love you!
7). Todd- He is a shining light. He has taught me many things that I needed to learn. He has a heart of gold. His laughter is what makes my day. I love him and cannot imagine life without him. He is truly a special gift!
8). Jackson- He was an answered prayer after 4 years! He has a smile to melt my heart. He is the completion to our family. I look forward to seeing his personality emerge! He is also a special gift!
9). Faith LeeAnn- She is the daughter that we lost in 2007. Although it was a huge disappointment to lose her, she is the daughter I always desired. I look forward to meeting her one day. She is in the best place to be! I love you baby girl even though I have not seen you face-to-face.
10). My church- I am thankful to have such a great place to raise Todd and to develop my spiritual walk.
11). My friends (both new and old that I have reconnected with)- You all are the ones that have helped make me who I am today. I love you all!
12). Brad's job- He has been blessed with a job that pays well and that he enjoys!
13). My home- We have been blessed with a nice home that we have been able to add on to this year.
14). Our 2 cars
15). The freedom to worship without worries of persecution
16). My family living in the same area so that we can spend time with one another
17). My health
18). My youth minister growing up (Randy)- He helped develop me into who I am today. He helped me grow and stretch spiritually. I do not think that I would be as strong as I am today if it weren't for his guidance.
19). Our youth ministry job- though it ended rough, it taught me to appreciate my children's youth ministers one day and it allowed me to see what a talent Brad has with teens.
20). My teaching jobs- They taught me compassion, patience, determination, unconditional love, and thankfulness. Those kids were some of the most amazing kids on this earth!
21). My financial security- We have been blessed with great financial security this year. That is such a blessing!
22). Seasons- This allows me to see the beauty of God. They amaze me every time!
23). Phones, TV, dishwasher, washing machine, dryer, etc- These are so convenient and useful!
24). Todd's school- The principal and teacher are Christians. The school is safe and provides what he needs academically.
25). Harding University- This helped me find my husband, allowed me to get a degree, and helped me grow spiritually.
26). All of our moves- I have moved 6 times (in 5 states) since I was born. Each move, though some were very hard, taught me something I needed to learn.
27). My childhood- It was happy, safe, and enjoyable.
28). The Bible
29). Our military who protect us daily
30). Christian music- That is just about all I listen to. I gives me encouragement.
31). Prayer- I can express my concerns and thankfulness to God.
32). God and His sacrifice- Need I say more?

I could give more. I have to admit that at times I had to think pretty hard. I would love to see what others are thankful for even if it is not this long!

Roll Tide!

As many of my high school friends know, we are HUGE Alabama fans. Bama is having an amazing year. Usually, my family gets together to watch some of the Alabama games. This year has been different because my dad and brother got season tickets. However, we got together to wath the LSU game. We took some pictures of the boys in their gear. Aren't they cute?!

Todd is in the grey shirt.

Our newest Bama Fan. Roll Tide Roll!

Sleep At Last!!!

Well, we have had 2 good nights of sleep in a row. I hope and pray that this continues. Jackson has been eating at 9:30is and then again at 2:00 ish and then at 6:15 ish. I will gladly take that!!! I feel so much better. Maybe I can get this giant stack of laundry done now.

We found out a big reason he was not sleeping. He was allergic to the formula we were supplementing with. We had already figured out he could not tolerate diary. I have cut all of that out of my diet since he was having trouble. I also cut out broccoli, garlic, onions, tomato based foods, spicy foods and lettuce because he has had trouble with them. Yes, eating is not fun right now and VERY bland. Well, we had put him on soy, which is what Todd had to take. Within a few days, Jackson had a rash appear in his face. I thought it was baby acne. It got worse and began to spread and he was spitting up as much as an ounce of his bottle. I took him in and they said he was allergic to the soy formula. Now he is on some weird, nasty formula. He is so much happier and comfortable. We feel bad that he was having reactions to what we were giving him and could not rest. I hope this fixes things!

Halloween late..

Here are a few pictures from Halloween. We did not take Jackson out so we did not get him a "true" costume. Todd went to my brother's house with my mom on Halloween. He did not go trick or treating that night. They wanted to pass out candy. All of them had already done 2 trunk or treats so they had PLENTY of candy!

Our Indiana Jones.

Jackson is awake to celebrate Halloween.

My 2 precious boys!!

Pictures at last!!!!

I finally got around to loading some pictures of Jackson. He is 3 weeks old today. Boy the time goes fast!Todd kissing his baby brother. He does this a lot in a days time.

This is what we tend to see at 2:00 am. Isn't he cute?

Jackson taking control of the remote. No, this was not planned he did it on his own! With 3 boys, I have no chance at holding the remote.

It's been a while

I will try to quickly update things. I really plan to post some more pictures soon! Here are the highlights:

• Todd has adjusted amazingly well. After all, he was an only child for 6 years! He wants to hold him and kiss him constantly!
• Jackson does not sleep at night. He has stomach issues from 11:00 pm to 4:30 am. Yes, I have to hold him that entire time or he cries, no he screams!
• I am feeling good now but had to get on an antibiotic because I was running a fever if 101 for several days. Brad stayed home and worked from here so he could help. My mom did a few all night watches so I could sleep. I am feeling much better now!
• We took Jackson for his 2 week check-up yesterday. He had grown 1/4 of an inch and weighed 9lb 5 oz. He obviously doesn't have problems eating.
• We were told we couldn't take him to church until he was 2 months because of flu season and cold season. That is a downfall to having a baby in the fall and not the summer. The doctor said if he ran a fever at his age, we would hospitalize him immediately. We don't want that so we will keep him in.

Well, that sums things up for now. I am off to do a couple of things while he is asleep. This is his time of sleep!

Update

Okay, we have been busy and I have not posted anything. We are doing well. Jackson does not care for the night sleep too much but he seems to be sleeping better today so I hope we can get some sleep in tonight. Todd has been at my brother and sister-in-law's house for 2 days. this has made things easier. He is crazy about Jackson. I will [post more pictures when I have a few minutes.


Oh, I also had to make a trip to the ER on Friday night. Things seem fine but my incision had some discharge (TMI). They said it was normal so I did not have to do anything. Overall, this surgery is MUCH easier than it was with Todd! I am getting around well. I guess it is a good thing since I have Todd to take care of and Brad going back to work.

Anyway, please continue to pray for healing and health!

Jackson Is Here!

Here are picures of Jacskson Ray Beasley. He was born at 1:04 pm and weighed 8 lbs 12 1/2 oz. He was 20" long. Todd is crazy about him! Everyone is doing well. Thanks for all of the prayers! I will post more pictures later!

Busy Day

Okay, today is already proving to be way busier than I hoped it to be. First, it is my birthday. I am 32 today. Does that really seem possible? That sounds so old to me! I have also already made a trip to the pediatrician's office this morning. Todd ran a low grade temp Friday night. It quickly left so we assumed things were fine. Last night, he began to complain about an earache and a sore throat. Keep in mind, Todd had strep 4 times last year. I decided we had to find out if he was contagious because we don't want Jackson sick. He ended up with a sinus infection. That is east to cure and deal with. We were VERY thankful about that. Then, I am trying to complete things here before tomorrow. My mom will stay at our house so that Todd will be in his bed at night and we don't have to board the dogs for the week. Finally, at 1:00 today, we close on the addition to our house.

I guess all of this proves one thing...
I am old and the thought of all of this makes me want to take a nap since I haven't slept well all week!

By the way, please keep me and Jackson in your prayers tomorrow. I am scheduled for the c-section at 12:30. I will post news as soon as I can!

CRAZY WEEK

Okay, this week has been crazy. First, our phones were messed up which made my Internet out of commission. Can I just say that I am really dependent on it! I was able to use Brad's at night. The problem with that is that I am so tired at night that I could not function. The only thing I really did was check on my friend's baby who is in NICU. Please keep them in your prayers. I cannot imagine how exhausted and emotionally drained they are!

On top of that, I have been trying to get ready for Jackson's arrival. I have done so many loads of baby laundry getting ready. We had a shower on Sunday and got lots of cute outfits that I washed up. We got some really good stuff that we needed like blankets and things like that. We are blessed to be a part of a wonderful church family!

After all of the prep time, I am now realizing just how close October 7th is. I told Brad that we will see just how much difference 6 years make. I pray that recovery is as fast as it was for Todd. I find it funny that I feel like a first time mom again. It has been so long. I feel anxious just like I did with Todd. We are very excited, though. God has blessed us with another little boy and we can't wait to meet him.

Well, as you can see, I am tired and rambling so I will stop now!

Cardboard testimonies

If you go to church with me, you may not want to look at this blog because it is something that we are doing on Sunday and it may not be as effective!!!!

This is something that we were exposed to through the youth group a few weeks ago. The teens watched the video that follows and wrote their own cardboard testimonies. I tried to link the video and it did not want to cooperate. Please take a minute to watch this if you have not seen it. It is amazing!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RvDDc5RB6FQ


This made me think about my cardboard testimony. I believe every Christian has an amazing testimony. Sure, in the world's standards, there are some people that have more drastic conversion stories. However, we all have a story. God has changed all of us. So, here is my question, what is your cardboard testimony? How has God used you to change this world? How has God impacted your life and are we letting Him use us? I know there have been times when I have not allowed Him to use me. I pray that we all will allow Him to use us to reach a lost world. I love what the man ask at the end... What if this was our welcoming committee.

C-Section date changed

Well, I went to the Dr today and we moved the C-section up. The ironic thing was he said either the 6th or 7th. The 6th is my birthday so I opted for the 7th so that he could have his own birthday. Brad informed me it was more like I would have my own because he would have taken over that day! My blood pressure was better but the doctor was afraid I would not make it to the 10th. That is not many days different but at this point, it is a little bit earlier and that is good with me. It does make me lose a few days, though. I guess I should get busy. Brad and my parents are painting Todd's room this weekend so I need to go vacuum and get it ready. Todd decided after the nursery was painted that he "hated" his room color. He has chosen a BRIGHT YELLOW for his room. I started to argue and decided it would not last forever and he has loved yellow for a long time now. I guess I will just invest in some good indoor sunglasses!

Update

First of all, to all of my high school friends, I will post stories of my junior high years one day. It was a difficult time for me!

On another note, I have been put on modified bed rest until Thursday. I will go to the doctor then and we will see what he says. This came because my blood pressure has crept up little by little. Saturday night, I had a migraine so bad that I could not sleep. On Sunday, I checked my blood pressure and it was 135/91. My normal is 110/upper 70's. I have had some trouble since then, but not as bad. I am not good at taking it easy but I am trying very hard. I want to make it to 38 weeks if I can! That is September 30th. Anyway, I had this trouble with Todd but it was when I was 38 weeks. That is why they took him 10 days early. We will see what happens on Thursday. Please keep me and Jackson in your prayers. I guess we will throw Brad in that mix since he will be picking up a lot of the load for a few weeks!

Tagged

I was tagged by my friend Kristin. So here we go.

I am suppose to tell you 6 things that you may not know about me. I will give it a try.

1.) I am terrified of snakes. It is almost a phobia state. I think they are ugly and scary.

2). I do not walk over drainage crates on the road. I have always been scared that I would fall in and be left to die in their. Todd now avoids them as well.

3). I have always wanted to get a degree in American Sign Language. It fascinates me and I tend to run into people with hearing impairments that I could translate for to help them. I am able to help some, just not as much as I would like.

4). The profession I have always done, teaching special education, was not my original degree. My original degree was elementary education. I added it only after I needed more credits to be full time. I did not intend on using it, but got into it and love it!

5). I do not eat fish of any kind. Yuck!

6). I was rebellious in my junior high years. I was a habitual liar and did many things behind my parents back. Thankfully, there were lots of people looking after me and I got caught every time. So, I never got into too much trouble! I think this is why I like Jr. High to this day. I know it was a tough 3 years for me!

There you have it. Not too exciting. I will tag anyone that wants to do it. Most of you were already tagged.

Ike Continued

Here is a new picture of the damage done during Hurricane Ike. This is literally blocks from my father-in-law's house. These houses that remain were the very expensive homes that were much higher off of the ground. I cannot imagine going to my home and seeing this!

I guess this is a reminder that our home is temporary and that the structure we live in is just a house. Our home is a place of refuge, comfort, support, and love. When the house is gone, we should rely on the people that make it a home. I guess this is a modern reminder of the song we have sang for years about the wise man building his house on the Rock. Despite the destruction, our Lord is still there to mend their hearts and pain if only they will let Him. That is my prayer for all of those suffering right now. I pray that they will have a peace that only He can provide!

Hurricane Ike

I cannot imagine what a hurricane would be like. I have experienced the edge of a tornado and it was bad. Winds of 100 miles an hour and rising water sound like hell on earth to me. With that being said, I cannot imagine why people would not evacuate! I would pack up the things that are most important and get out of town. I would not wait to see if it was going to get bad.





My father-in-law is from the Galveston, Texas area. He let but he did not go too far. He is in a suburb of Houston and is still without power. We have talked to him briefly. He is safe but was told that he would have nothing left. He is in his mid 60's and has lived in this area since he retired. He was a hard worker and saved a lot of money. However, now so much of that is gone. He asked Brad to be watching for pictures or video of his area. I have included a picture of the part of the peninsula that he lived in. As you can see, there is nothing left.

I will post some more pictures later. It is hard to even comprehend such destruction.

One word... Huge

For those of you that do not read facebook, we had an ultrasound today. I am 35 weeks and 2 days as of today. After the measurements, they have predicted that he is 7 pounds 7 ounces! Todd was 8 lbs 1 oz at birth. He was only 10 days early. Jackson still has 4 weeks to cook until the scheduled c-section. If the stats are true (that they gain 1/2 lb week), he will be 9 1/2 - 10 lbs at birth. My doctor was not in the office today for me to discuss it with him. He had kidney stones yesterday. I do not know if they will take him earlier or let he be half grown at birth. Also, my blood pressure was 125/86. This is high for me. I was 113/85 just 2 weeks ago and that is higher than my normal. I am not sure what that will mean. I am going to try to get things finished up as much as possible just on case I am put on bed rest or taken to the hospital earlier. Please just keep all of this in your prayers. We are very excited about Jackson. We have prayed for him for nearly 4 years!

Decisions

Can I just say that I am terrible at making decisions. Sure, some are made fast ans with very little thought. Others, I take forever and question myself on them a million times. We have been adding a 300 sf foot den to our house. Some things have been easy. However, most things have taken me a while. Flooring was the last big decision. We had one option that was $600 less than the other option. However, the more expensive was a little better match I thought. I went back and forth trying to decide. Finally, I decided on the more expensive. We should be done with the addition next week! I am ready to have my house back. It's been as good as it can get, though. An elder at our church has done it. He is very nice and I had complete confidence in him! It has also been a very clean group of people working on the house. I am excited that it will be done! We look forward to more space for those swings, bouncers, etc. Babies really do take up lots of space.

By the way, I have an ultrasound Thursday. I have been having some pains. We will find out more then. I am anxious to see how much this baby weighs!

Weird post

Okay, I posted something new today and it put it down several posts. I am interested to see others views on this so go to the post about eyes and let me know what you think.

Smiles all over

After school yesterday, Todd came in and went to his room to play. He had been playing Star Wars while listening to The Lion King soundtrack. I had gone in to check on him because he had been in there for about an hour without any communication from me. He was just totally involved in light saber fights. I returned to my room to continue laundry. In about 10 minutes, Todd comes in covered in smile stamps. His arms and legs were total smiley faces. I laughed and did not think much about it. In a minute, he returned and had continued the stamping to his stomach and face. At this point, I thought it was getting out of control. He ran into his room and was going to add some more but stepped in the ink pad. He then got it on our wood floors and his carpet. Now I was not happy. I toted all 58 pounds of him to the bathroom and went to clean the wood. Thankfully, it came right up. The carpet was another story. As I went to put the lids on the stamp pads, I realized that only one of them was washable. It was then that I began to panic. I mean, he was COVERED in these stamps. I put him in the tub and began to scrub. Thankfully, most of them were the washable and came right off. The others came of with some scrubbing except one. He now has a perfectly stamped smile right on his butt check. Yes, he had managed to put on there and it is the one that will not come off. I guess he has a smile tattoo for now. I should have taken a picture of his modest stamping but when it was getting on my floor, I had to get it off. When Brad asked him why he did it, Todd replied, "I was just so happy to have a long weekend!" I guess who can blame him on that. I thought I might need to watch Brad since he was happy to have some time off, too!

The Results are in..

I went to the Dr. today and FINALLY got the test results back from my whooping cough. The verdict was that I am not immune to it so I could catch it. However, it did not look like I had it. They could not tell for sure because you show traces of it if you have been immunized. Basically, I am fine unless I start hacking my head off. Then, I probably have it. He did say that the baby would not be harmed. All in all, that is good news.

Also, I will have another ultrasound in 2 weeks to double check things with the 2 vessel cord. He wants to do one final check before the c-section. I am anxious to know what his estimated weight is going to be.

As always, please continue to pray that Baby Jackson is safe and healthy!

Prayers

Yet again, I have another issue with this pregnancy. I got a note in the mail from Todd's pediatrician saying that when he was in for his well visit someone treated him that was contagious with whooping cough. He is up to date on his shots, so he should be okay. I haven't had that shot in years. I had to go today and get the blood drawn (16th tube this pregnancy)to see if it is positive. They have not even told me what they will do if I have it. The scary thing is that I had to take medicine for coughing since then. Please keep me and baby Jackson in your prayers. It will be several days before I hear anything. I will keep you up to date!

In Your Eyes

I have always felt like every person has been given special talents that should be used for God's Kingdom. I know that for some people these talents are easier discovered than for others. I, however, have seen this in a different way lately. I have been drawn to the thought that God gives us "different eyes" that allow us to see different people in different ways. I feel like as a church, when we use those eyes, there would be no one left out or excluded. I think that we could not have enough room in any building to seat all of those that we could reach.

Brad and I have spent some time discussing what "eyes" we were given. I have no doubt that Brad was given the eyes for teens. Not only does he do well with teens, he does well with teens that struggle or whose parents do not attend church. He can convince many teens to come to things that do not do anything. He can build relationships with them quickly.

My "eyes" are 2 fold. I have a talent with children with disabilities. Unfortunately, I have never been in a church where this has been used. I have reached many people through my jobs with this gift. My other view is teens. I love their minds. I love that they are trying to find their own faith and are not afraid to be honest when they don't get something.

Here is the thing that frustrates me about all of this... I think even though we are given different eyes, we are still from the same Father and should have the same mindset. I may not have eyes for foreign missions, but I still appreciate that mission and support it because it is someone's passion. It seems that many times, we get wrapped up in our vision that we forget to support others vision. After all, isn't that the purpose of church?

So, what are your talents that you feel that God gave you? Do you think that it is easy for you to use this talent in a church setting?

Double personality

Okay, I wrote about Todd's fits lately. It is driving me crazy. He was good tonight but the 2 nights before were terrible. The thing that makes me frustrated is that the arguments do not even matter. Last night was one of those nights. I was so angry that after Brad got home I left to take a minute before I lost my cool. He actually managed to lose going to see Clone Wars this weekend, lost his Wii for more days, and can not go spend the night with friends Friday night all over a stupid issue.

Anyway, after he has acted this way, I go to meet him for lunch today. Since I use to teach there, our meal gets interrupted many times by teachers. I was talking to my assistant from last year when Todd's teacher came to get them from lunch. She asked how I was feeling and then told me something that just about made me fall over laughing. She said, "He is so sweet. He is the sweetest thing. I ask him to do something and he does it with a smile. I just love him." I wanted to say, "You do know that Todd is my child, right?" It cracked me up. I guess he is taking after me. I could be throwing a huge fit and turn it off just like that. My teachers always said the same about me. Now I know why that drove my mom crazy. I would rather him act that way with us and not at school. I guess he uses all of his energy to be good at school and has to get it out of his system!

Perfect Day

Today has been such a beautiful day! It has been sunny and 84 for the high. It is this weather that makes me get ready for fall and my favorite sport: football! I have such fond memories from this time of year. This year will be no different. Jackson will be born before we know it. I am less than 9 weeks from the latest he will be born. It is such an exciting time of year!

Today has been one of those mornings. It has been a time of pregnancy raging emotions. It all started when Todd got up not wanting to go to school. One thing about Todd, he is very smart and is at the top of his class, but he HATES school. He is often bored and it does not work well with his love of moving and exploring. He often does not want to go to school, but today was hard for me. Last year when I taught at school with him, we had a set routine. We would walk in together and at one particular spot, we would hug and share our "have a good days" and then he would head for the gym and I would go into the teacher's lounge to do all of the morning teacher business. Now, I pull up to a door, get a hug from the backseat and drive off. It seems so cold and lonely for us both. Today, as I pulled away, he mouthed "I will see you later" with his smile on his face. I just wanted to stop grab him and take him back home. I knew he was walking in to a place that he was dreading. I did not want him to have to dread his day. I know that he has to go and that he will have a good day, it is just hard when they do not want to go. I know he will have to encounter many things he does not want to do, but must do them. Anyway, I guess pregnancy hormones have taken over today, because I have cried today over stupid things. Oh well, I am going to surprise Todd and meet him for lunch. Perhaps that will help us both!

No, Not that

For those of my readers that are parents.. Have you ever seen a characteristic in your child that is so much like you and you wished you could change it? I had a night like that tonight. Let me explain!

As a young child, I had a TERRIBLE temper. I would hit my head on the floor in anger and tear up my favorite toys. I was awful. My mom worked with me and never gave up. I claim that I would have been labeled emotionally disturbed or behavior disordered if it weren't for her. Sad to admit, but I still have some temper that I have to work CONSTANTLY on to keep it under control. So, tonight when I saw a HUGE temper out of Todd I wanted to scream. I wanted to beat it out of him so that he would not have the struggles I have had and still have to work on daily. As I took away the WII (his favorite thing ever) and then watched him nearly lose his chance to see Clone Wars (something he has talked about since April), I wanted to help him to see the way I see it now. Unfortunately, he can't yet. I wanted him to see how this entire fit was useless and would not end with him "winning" He would only lose things and still do it my way. Yet, it took many things being removed before he got the picture. As I came into our room, I told Brad, "I thought we were done with this phase from his terrible 2's". Unfortunately, he has to learn how to make a mistake and move on. He and I tend to get so mad at ourselves when we mess up that we make more bad decisions. I just hope that I can help him see this like my mom did for me.

Parenting is so tiring and scary! I know tonight I will say an extra prayer for wisdom for all of us. I think we could all benefit from more prayers for each other!

The Fall

As I have stated before in previous blogs, this pregnancy has been very different from the first. I have had complications, stresses, and concerns that I did not have before. Saturday night was no different. I was tired and had just put Todd to bed. We have been going to bed later than usual so I was very tired. I went to walk into our living room and fell flat on my stomach after tripping over a mop handle that was laying in the floor from where we had been cleaning earlier. I tried to catch myself but still hit my stomach. After a few minutes of being mad at myself and referring to my What To Expect book, I decided to call the Dr. I thought they would say, "NO blood, no big deal" but instead it was, "go to the Er and get hooked up to the monitors just in case". We got Todd out of bed and drove to the ER, where my parents met us and took Todd home. After 3 hours of monitoring, a urine sample, 5 tubes of blood, and the sounds of a screaming woman giving birth, we were discharged. We were out of the Er at 1:30 am. I was put on "bed rest" on Sunday as a precaution. I did not follow it too well because Todd's meet the teacher was that afternoon and so I wanted to meet her. I guess all of that will be another blog entry!

one really sad part to the whole story was Todd's reaction to the fall. He had heard me fall and came rushing from his room. He wanted to know if I was OK and then he asked what I had fallen on. We told him the handle and he went right back to bed with no other comments or questions. When he woke up in the hospital room, Brad was going to explain where we were and he said he knew it was because of the fall. He came to the bedside and said in the sweetest, most loving voice, "I am sorry mommy. I laid that mop down. I hope you are OK". I was so glad that the end result was good because I am not sure how he would have handled it all.


Anyway, I am fine and so is the baby. It was just another story to add to this pregnancy. Needless to say, I will be glad when October 15th arrives!!!

One of those days

We all had those days. The kind that you wished you had never even started and was excited that it was finally over. Monday was one of those days. Todd was going to stay with my mom and dad for a few days with my nephews so that they could all go to VBS at my parent's church. I had a few errands to run before getting over there. I agreed to stay and help get them to VBS since my mom can only carry 2 in her car. I was really tired that day because I had not slept well. That made for a negative start. During the day, things went fine. We were busy, but everyone was fine. I took Todd to VBS and went to Walmart while he was there. My mom was there so I did not need to worry about leaving him. I went and took him back home and helped get them situated for the night. It was then that things went downhill FAST. On my way home, Brad tells me that the addition we had already signed paperwork on, might not happen because of easement issues. I was FURIOUS. We had already ripped out a deck, signed construction loan papers and had part of a fence removed and we might not get to get our nice playroom! Brad and I were discussing this. We decided to go outside and see if we could find our property marker and see what we thought. As I walked out the door, Brad comes behind me and shuts the door. Sudden;y I hear him say, "Oh, no, the door is locked. We can't get back in". My response was, "Are you kidding me?!" Oh, I forgot to say that it is 11:00 at night. I had not eaten dinner and I already had a headache from the stress of the issues before. I immediately went to the back door, locked of course. Great. We had no phone on us, no way to get in, and everyone around us was asleep. Brad began to walk down the street to the nearest gas station. He took money to call my parents (who live 20 minutes away). My mom answered and my dad came to the rescue. By the time this was all done, it was almost midnight. I was so tired, mad, and exhausted. I am glad I did not have a Dr. appointment to check blood pressure, I am sure I would have been rushed to the ER with an injection to settle it. Anyway, after all of that, I went yesterday to get a key to hide. Our doors can be opened form the inside and are locked. I am really surprised we have not had more issues like that. And, our room issues were solved and my new addition is in the process. We just have to hope that it is finished before Jackson arrives!!

Oh the Joys

Since school begins August 1st, the class lists were posted today. I thought that teaching at the same school Todd went to would be a big advantage. Boy, was I wrong. As I looked over the list, I found my stomach turning. I would think to myself, "Oh, no, not that kid". I literally told Brad there was one kid I did not want to be in his class. Of course, there was that kid's name on the list. I told Brad and I will hold my tongue, but I do know all of the background to this student and will not put up with behaviors like last year. Todd was very good last year. He was in trouble 2 times, which is very good. However, he will have a lot of transition this year and has potential to get wrapped up into trouble. He is all boy. I do know this, I prayed that he would get who he needs for this year, even if I do not know that person. He got a new teacher. She has taught before and comes from a strong christian family. Let's just hope she has GREAT classroom management! I guess I will try to put aside my thoughts and go with an open mind. Oh, I only thought knowing everyone was good!

The Baby Borrowers

I had seen this show advertised but was at church each week when it was showing. Brad and Todd left today to go visit his dad at the beach for a few days so I had plenty of time tonight. I realized this show was on tonight in marathon form. I watched it and laughed so hard. The show is about teens that think they are ready to get married and have children. They set them up with babies under 1 first and then toddlers. It was so funny to watch them. They had each age for 3 days and nights. Some did very well but realized they were not ready. Others, could not communicate with each other at all.

Brad and I got married young. We chose to wait for 5 years before having kids. I think that was so wise of us. We were able to develop our relationship before bringing a baby into the relationship. As I watched this show, it made me realize a few things
1). I am glad I was older when Todd was born
2). I am so glad that Brad and I can communicate so well with each other.
3). Children are priceless but are a lot of work.
4). relationships are a lot of work.
5). I cannot imagine my life without the support of Brad and family.

This also made me wonder.. what do you think has been the hardest stage you have had to handle your child/children? Is it the first month of their life, terrible 2's, terrible 3's, etc. I am interested to see what you have to say. And for those of you with more than one child.. was it different with each child?

Happy Birthday, Todd!!

It is hard to believe that it has been six years since God blessed us with such a sweet boy. As I look at these pictures of him as a baby, I am saddened at how fast time has flown by but I am so proud of who he is thus far. I could not ask for a child that could bring anymore joy to our lives than Todd has brought. He is my entertainment every day. As I look at his face, I am reminded of those spit-up drenched clothes, those smiles that still melt my heart, of those tantrums at two, the first time he told me he loved me, the first day of pre-school, and the first day at school. But most importantly I see a precious soul that God has granted Brad and I. When I look at him. I see the true meaning of the lyrics of the song Every Time.

Every time
Words and Music: Philip Organ © 1994 Philip Organ Lyrics:
Everytime I kneel to pray I open up my heart to my Lord
Everytime I close my eyes I feel the sweet embrace of my Lord

Chorus 1:I don't know why so many things seem to get in the way of seeing my God's glory
But I try everyday to see and thank Him for all the things He's given me

Everytime I see a child I see the gentleness of my Lord
Everytime I watch a storm I know the awesome power of my Lord

Chorus 2:I don't know why so many things seem to get in the way of seeing my God's glory
But I try everyday to see and thank Him for all the things He's given me

Everytime I see a cross!

Happy Birthday, Buddy!

PS I Love You

Brad and I watched this movie tonight. I will not tell too much about it but at deals with coping with death of a spouse. Thankfully, I have never had to endure this. However, I cried like a baby during parts of this movie.

As most of you know, almost a year ago we were expecting a baby. We ended up losing this baby at 8 weeks. We had genetic testing and found out that it was a girl. We named her Faith. As I watched this movie, I thought about the lose of this baby. I will never know what she looked like or who she acted like. I will also never have a little girl in a physical sense (We are done after Jackson). All of that is sad to me, however, as Jackson was kicking non-stop, it made me realize he would not have been here if Faith had been here. I do not know what the Lord has in store for our family. I do not know what Jackson will be like or who he will look like, but I do know that God has a plan for him. He needed Jackson on this Earth. So, though my heart still hurts with our loss, it leaps for joy at the thought of my baby boy, Jackson! I can't wait to see what God has in store for him!

Baby Update

Today we had our follow-up ultrasound since they could not get all of the views at the 20th week. I was nervous still because of the 2 vessel cord that I mentioned. Today, after much poking, we were able to get all of the views except the profile possibly. She got a picture of the profile, but was not sure if the Dr. would think it was good enough. All of the anatomy was NORMAL!! We are very excited. Today showed that he is 24 plus weeks. This is a week ahead of what we have said. That makes the estimated due date my birthday! He is already 1 lb 8 oz. He is not a small boy.



By the way, I have had some ask if we have a name. Yes, we do. He will be named Jackson Ray. These are both family names. We will call him Jackson, not Jack!



On a side note, have you ever felt that God places situations in front of us to make us rely on him? That is the way I have felt this entire time with this pregnancy. First of all, we were able to get pregnant after many years and a miscarriage. Then, I was so worried that we would lose this baby. Each of the first few visits, they were unable to locate heartbeats so I had to have ultrasounds. After all of that, they told me about the cord issues. Each visit I have had has required me to wait to get answers. Some visits is is minutes others it is days.

I guess these experiences are forcing me to trust. Trust God and no one else. It is also teaching me patience. I have always considered myself patient. I guess this just proves you can always better yourself. In the scheme of a christian walk with Him I guess trust and patience would rant high with Him.

Complaint

I have to say that I hate a modified year around school schedule. I did not like it as a teacher and I hate it as a parent. We got out of school on May 30th. Todd will be back in class on August 1st. That is not enough summer break. It seems like they just get started and it is over. Between VBS, vacation to Brad's dad's house, birthday party, Brad's mom visiting, and Forth of July, there is no extra time. Anyway, I guess I will have to deal with it or home school, which will not happen. Does everyone else have such a short summer?

VBS

Okay, this time last year I was heading up our VBS. I organized everything from registration and advertising to crafts and skits. I loved the imagination part of it and since I wasn't working I had time to bargain shop. This year, I refused to head it up. However, I got roped into crafts again. Since I was trying to finish up my school work, I ignored it for a while. The church-wide VBS is this Saturday and we are doing a small VBS for some girls on Friday. I have good memories of VBS. I really had fun with it in high school. A friend of mine always had extravagant ideas. We would spend countless hours together working on it. Perhaps that is how we became such good friends. However, I think VBS has lost some of its impact. What do you all think. Do you think it is still an effective outreach or in reach? Do you think it may be a time when something else is more effective? I just would like some others feedback.

A weekend alone

Brad and Todd got up early Saturday to take a trip to Six Flags for the day. Since Brad traveled so much last summer, he has tons of hotel points. They decided they would spend the night Saturday night and return home today. Well, I get a call this morning from Todd saying he REALLY wanted to go to Six Flags again today. See, it was so hot yesterday that he spent a lot of the day in the water park. Thus, he did not get to ride all of the rides. Since he is so tall, he can ride things that go upside down and backwards. I told Brad to go to the store and get a Lunchables because they had a free child's ticket. He went and purchased the last box they had. So, Todd and Brad are spending all day today at Six Flags and will return home tonight. My house has been so quiet I do not even know what to do. Yesterday, my mom and dad came and painted the nursery Aloe Vera green. I love the color. I figure we will do something besides blue while we can. I will have to take a picture of the nursery when we are done. It will be several weeks, though. We are going to lay wood flooring before we move everything back in the room.

Laminin

I was able to hear this lesson live at a Chris Tomlin concert. I was reminded of it this week. This is by a guy named Louie Giglio. He does a lot of teen talks. I have added the video. It is about 9 min. It is amazing stuff. If you get a chance, watch this!

http://www.godtube.com/view_video.php?viewkey=152b5103d741aca61093

It's a ......

BOY!!! Yes, we will have another little boy. We are excited and Todd is saying he will look like him. We will have a follow-up ultrasound in 3 weeks. They were not able to get pictures of a few things and will do it again then. We were also told that my cord has only one artery and one vein instead of two arteries. They Dr. said that happens some times. I made a BIG mistake and looked it up on the Internet and made myself nervous. I guess there are some issues with birth defects when this is present. This baby has given us a run for our money already! Please keep us in your prayers. I am sure things are fine because they would have looked at it sooner if it were really bad, but it still makes me nervous. We can't wait to invite this little one in our family!

I was tagged

I was tagged by my friend Tamara to write a six word sentence summarizing my outlook on life. After thinking on this, here is what I decided: Trust in God at all times.



I have endured many challenging circumstances in my life. Many of these times, I questioned God. I felt like I was being punished. Almost all of these times, I saw later that it was a blessing. I will give you a few examples:

• Brad and I losing our job in Oklahoma with a 2 month old baby: At the time, we were very angry. This is a time in my life I was most angry at God. I did not understand. After all, I had to live with my parents for many months. Now, I see it as a HUGE blessing. One, we were able to move closer to my family, which allowed Todd to be very close to my parents. Two, we were able to make a lot more money. Finally and most importantly, in the long run, we developed a much stronger faith in God!


• Brad getting a job in Chicago: This really stunk at the time. He was gone 4 nights a week. When he was home, he was working on next week's stuff and we had to pay major money because he was self-employed. However, it only lasted 4 months and now he is in a field he loves and makes good money. This opportunity totally changed his career path into something he loves.


• Difficulty getting pregnant: This was hard. I doubted myself in this one. I thought that I was unable to have another child because of my inability to parent. Now, I see that it was in His timing. I realize now that Todd was a difficult 2 year old and needed all of my time and energy to discipline.


• Finally, losing a baby after so many years of trying: This was hard for me to even type. I do have to say that because of some of these other events, I did not struggle with this one like I would have thought. Don't get me wrong, I was caught saying things like, "He must love watching me suffer!" I had found peace with it but still hurt until I took my current job. After teaching children with severe disabilities, I realize that God spared me. He gave me the easy way out. He allowed me to not have to suffer over a child with severe problems.

OK, that was long and wordy! Sorry. Thanks, Tamara for having me think on this. I will tag a few people. I tag Tracy, Franklin, Jeni, and Becky.

Yes, I am here

I just realized how long it has been since I posted. If anyone is still reading, I will give some thoughts.

• A terrible stomach virus has been going around and I got it last week and now Todd has it. Luckily, it is fast moving. I almost ended up on IV with it, though. I hate stomach issues!!!


• We will find out the sex of our baby next week (29th). We are really excited!!


• I only have 4 1/2 more days of school and cannot wait!! It is true that teacher's are just as excited, if not more!


• We are looking at adding on an addition to our house. We want a big play room. I will keep you updated.


• Finally, Sunday was Senior Sunday at church. Since Brad is the youth deacon, we are around these kids all of the time. Todd loves it! There are some amazing kids graduating this year that will forever change a church somewhere. They are very spiritual and strong. In class, they were sharing advice to the younger teens. Being that I am pregnant, I fought back tears the entire time. It brought back emotions of my graduation and all of my friends from school. (I love you all dearly!!) I can remember my feelings. So, it brought me to another realization that these kids were Todd's age when I graduated. I am really getting old!!!

So, I thought it would be fun to get your feelings on the day you graduated and what advice you would tell a graduating Senior today. I will share my stuff in a few days!

Special Olympics

I have not posted any information in a while. I thought I would take a minute and write about my week this next week. I have signed my kids up in class to participate in Special Olympics. This is such a great program. When I was at Harding, I helped with it one year. It is an experience that is unlike anything else. The participants all have major struggles, but they have a spirit unlike anything I have witnessed. It is truly a blessing to participate. If you ever get a chance, do it.

Anyway, we are all participating. The kids are so excited. Now none of them can actually go to regionals this year because of their age, but next year they can. They have never done any kind of sport, so they are very excited. Here is the funny part, I am their coach. Yes, me. The non-athletic, 16 weeks pregnant woman is their coach. I guess it is a good thing that they aren't really competing. We go this Friday. I will let you all know how it turns out. I might decided I was crazy to do this. I doubt it, though!

Finally better

Okay. finally at almost 15 weeks, my morning/night sickness is basically gone! I am so glad. I was tired of being sick every night. Also, I am on my last week of regular pants. Today, I managed to squeeze into my regular pants. I told Brad I think this will be the last time I will be able to do that. I guess it is about time to start showing some. I did not show at all until I was 5 months with Todd. Everyone told me to expect it to come sooner this time. Oh, well, at least I know the baby is growing!

Huge Nightmare!

Let me just start this off and say that this has nothing to do with our unborn child!

I will tell you how the last 24 hours has been for me. Last night, we were expected to get some severe storms. I had followed the weather and knew the approximate time they would arrive. Just like clock work, Todd popped into our room at that time (1:00 ish). There was no way he was returning to bed. Brad left the bed and let Todd in. We had gotten home late because Brad had a flat tire (another good story for the last 24 hours) and so we had not given Todd his Zyrtec. He snored, coughed, and sputtered all night. On top of that, he slept right up next to me. Needless to say, sleep did not happen last night.

After no sleep, I woke up to see how the weather was going to be the remainder of the day. I saw bad storms expected around 10:30. I prepared for the worst and headed to school. During reading, we had a practice tornado drill because we missed it yesterday. We got in our spot in the hallway. 2-3 minutes later, we were back to the letter L. I got 3 picture identified and discussed when we hear this message, "Students, all faculty, and staff, this is a tornado drill." The kids moaned and we were not happy either. This time, we had to go to the 5th grade boy's bathroom. It doesn't get any nastier than that. We had our kids down basically sniffing nasty floors. The drill got longer and longer so we moved out of the bathroom. Finally, we realized that not far from the school, their was a tornado touchdown. Now, keep in mind, the kids think this is practice. As the time goes on, they are getting mad. They are complaining that they hurt. Finally, they told the 5th grade down our hall that it was real. After about 1 hour and 15 minutes, we were allowed to return to class. We missed our lunch schedules and most importantly, my kids missed their playtime. As you can imagine, we did not get anything accomplished the remainder of the day!

So, Jeni, it was taken very seriously. I know that both the principal and the assistant principal were outside watching the storms because we lost contact with central office. We all made it fine, but it was not fun! The funny thing is my poor kids thought it was just a long drill. When I asked Todd, he said he didn't like it because his legs hurt and "I was beginning to think it was a real tornado or something". Some of the Kindergarten even went to sleep!

Happy Birthday 1 day late

Yesterday was Erika's birthday. I know I am one day late but was very sick yesterday. I posted pictures on Rebecca's birthday back in October. I decided to gather past memories for Erika, too. Looking for these pictures is always so much fun. I hope all of my high school friends enjoy!

I love the yellow ball in Rebecca's hair!

Our powder puff game our Senior year. That was a lot of fun! It is a little hard to recognize us.

Some of us dressed up for Jr/Sr. This was our JR. year. Didn't we all look so young!

Erika, happy birthday. Although we are older and have gone our separate ways, I still remember all of the good times we shared! I pray that you have a wonderful year this year!

Various Happenings

I have been so busy the last week. I will try to update.

1). We started soccer this past week. Todd loves it because he is crazy about running. He says he wants to be a runner when he grows up. Let me just say, he DID NOT get that from me. I hate running. Walking, swimming, lifting weights.. those I like. Never would I choose to run. Anyway, he loves it and it is church based so it is not as competitive. It is also much shorter seasons and games than T-ball.

2). I had a 12 week appointment yesterday. Went in thinking quick and left 2 hours later. They went to listen to the heartbeat and could not find it. Yes, you read that right. They poked and pushed and could not get it. Also, my blood pressure was up a lot. Mine is usually on the verge of too low. See next point to see why it was high. Anyway, after much poking, they told me they could not get it and I would have to have an ultrasound. This time they sent me downstairs, which is the high risk doctors office. Surprisingly, I stayed calm. I filled all of their paperwork out and waited. Keep in mind, I was alone because Brad can't take off once a month for an appointment that should take 5 minutes. After what seemed like an hour, they called me back. They got their "big dog ultrasound equipment" out. I was watching and got nervous because I did not see the "flutter of the heart". Finally, I asked her if their was a heartbeat. She said their was and it looked great. But, let me just say, it was moving like crazy. Oh, great Todd is active enough. This will probably be constantly on the move! All checked out fine. They were having trouble because my placenta was in the front, which is fine. This makes them pick up my heartbeat instead of baby's. What a relief!!!

3). Now the explanation on the blood pressure. I cannot give any details, but work has been stressful! There has been a lot of things going on that is wearing me out. Please keep me in your prayers. This has been the most stress my job has EVER given me and I have dealt with a lot. Just keep me in your prayers!

4). Still sick as a dog from pregnancy! I am hoping it ends soon. I am 13 weeks tomorrow!!! This has got to end!

Well, that about wraps it up. Maybe I can get less busy and not have to write a marathon blog to catch people up!

Prayer

Many of my high school friends will remember Eddie Carson. He graduated 2 years before we did and was very close to my family. He spent a lot of time with them. My husband and brother are in a fantasy football leage that began in college. Eddie is part of that league. We found out today that he has a brain tumor or mass that will hae to be removed tomorrow (Wed). Please pray that he comes out of the surgery safely and they are able to remove it all. He is currently in ICU in Texas. Thanks for your prayers!

Donkey Race

I have to share this because it is so funny! Yesterday in Todd's Bible class, they were talking about Jesus traveling on a donkey. So, in class, they were going to have donkey races. Todd, being one of the biggest kids was going to be one of the donkeys. Todd got down on all fours and a little girl, a good friend of his and the preacher's daughter, got on his back. I am not sure how many were racing at one time, but it was obviously a competition to Todd. Evidently, as he was racing around a curve, his hands went out from under him and he slid nose-first on the carpet. He now has a carpet burn on the bridge of his nose and his forehead. Good news, though: He won the next race! I just wished I could have seen these races!

Breathe by Michael W. Smith

Brad is beginning a series witht he teens on believing in God and atheism. He handed out a 1 question survey to them yesterday. It simply asked where their faith was right now. The choices were:
1) My faith has been tested and I see him working in my life.
2). My faith has been tested but I am do not see him working in my life.
3). I am not sure if God exists or if I believe in him.
4). I do not believe in God.

This got me to thinking. Without a doubt, I could answer #1 today. Not to say that my spiritual life is perfect, but that I know he works in my life. There are times when I have trouble seeing it because of my own sin or distractions, but I know he is there.

However, as a teen, what would my answer have been? I know I believed in God but did I think he worked in my life? I do not know that I would have thought that. Would I have even had a handle of what that truly means? I do not think I would have understood that.

I think spiritual depth comes through experiences. No, they do not all hav eto be bad ones. Unfortunately, I tend to learn more from the valleys than the mountain peaks. I guess it is because we have to be desperate. Have you ever felt that desperation for something. Dying for chocolate, dying for a drink or food, dying to see a family member. How often are we dying to spend time with our God? How often are we "desperate for Him"?

I am reminded of an old song by Michael W Smith. I love this song! This is what I desire: to be desperate for Him. I have come along way, but I have a long way to go. I pray that we all can be that desperate for Him!

Beginning of Spring Break?

Okay, this weekend begins our 2 week Spring Break. I thought this was too early for a spring break and our weather is a big proof that I was correct. This morning, we woke up to snow covered ground. This is the most snow we have had in 5 years. Here are some pictures from our fun in the snow!

Todd with a big snowball! We made lots of these today! I love snowball fights!

Us and the snowman family. The snow would not cooperate in making a good ball. Todd was convinced that we needed to make all of us. Therfore, we resorted to bowls to speed up the process. That is why our snowmen look a little odd. We also were out of carrots so we used Fruit Loop drinking straws!
I added this picture because of the meaning behind it. If you look closely, behind the middle snowman (Me), you will see a tiny snowman with little stick arms. This is our baby snowman. Todd wanted to add it but we can't see it so we had to put it behind me. He was so excited about that addition!

Finally

We told Todd this morning about the baby. His response was priceless. His first response was "Really?" The he looks down and is confused. We showed him a picture, which looks like a peanut, and says, I don't see it. Then, he throws his arms up in the air and says, "Finally, it is our turn to have a baby"! He has talked about it all day. He says he wants a brother but refers to it as a she if he is not thinking about it. He will be so great with a baby. He can't wait to find out what it is!

Sigh, the sound of relief

Okay, many of you have read or know that we had an ultrasound today. Yesterday, we went and they could not hear the heartbeat but thought things were fine. Since I will have a repeat c-section, they have to know an exact fetal age. Therefore, an ultrasound within the next couple of weeks was needed. Well, me, the impatient one, had to know that this one was okay. I went to get the ultrasound and we have a peanut with a heartbeat of 171!!! We are very pleased and thankful. As always, please continue to pray for a health little one! Actual due date is October 15th. It will probably be taken before then. God is good!! Thanks for your prayers and concerns! By the way, we will tell Todd soon. Now I have to go to parent/teacher conferences! I will be there from 4-7 and I think only 1 parent is coming!!

Tagged

I was tagged by my friend Kristin. Here are my answers.

What I was doing 10 years ago: I was living in Arkansas going to school at Harding. I had almost been married 1 year. Yes, I was very young when I got married!! My life was very uncomplicated then.

5 Things on my To Do List today: It has already been a busy morning! I had to get Todd off to school. I had to go copy sheets for school since I am gone today. I have to return a few things to Target. I have to get an ultrasound. Go pick Todd up from my mom's this afternoon and do laundry.

Snacks I Enjoy: I enjoy cheese and crackers. I also like fruit when it is season. Ice cream is always good, too.

Things I would do if I were a Billionaire: If I were to have that kind of money, I would use a small portion to buy a bigger house and a truck for Brad. The rest I would give away. I have always wanted to fund and run a school for special education students that could be little or no cost for the families. I also think a lot of St. Jude's. I would have fun giving it away!

3 of my Bad Habits: Worrying: I am working on that. Back-seat driver, and procrastinating

5 places I have lived: Okay, this list is crazy. Just for your entertainment I will list them all! Montgomery, AL (2 diff. times), Nashville, TN (2 different times but 4 houses), Dallas, Texas (1 time), Searcy, Arkansas (1 time but 3 houses), Atlanta Georgia (1 time), Ponca City, Ok (1 time but 2 houses). Yes, I hate to move now!!!!

5 Jobs I have had: Q-Zar party coordinator, day care worker, babysitter, special education teacher, personal tutor, and stay-at-home mom!


Well, there you have it. I think most of my friends that will do this have been tagged, but I will tag Jeni. I am sure she will do it. If anyone else wants to do it, go for it and leave a message so I will know to read it.

Out Again

Yes, we got another day off of school due to snow. We have not any real good snows just enough to make the schools cancel. As you can imagine, Todd is VERY upset when we have too miss school! (Yes, I am being sarcastic). I am glad we were out because our absentees have been crazy this week. I have 7 in my class and the past 2 days I only had 3 and it was not the same 3. We have the flu, a stomach virus, and strep going around. I hope to stay clear of that.

On anther note, I go to the Dr. a week from today. I am very nervous and excited all balled into one. I have not had any bleeding thus far. I am hopeful that all is well. Please continue to keep me in your prayers. Oh, and yes, I have been very sick!

Well, that's all for now. I am going to go curl up while Todd plays the Wii!

In Christ Alone Worship Video with Lyrics

Many of you probably know this song. I have loved this song since I first heard it. However, when you hear nearly 7,000 people sing it, it is so convicting. If you have never heard this song, listen to it. It is even better acapella but I could not find a version of it. May we live our lives as if He really commands our destiny! May we stand arm and arm and make a stand for our Lord and Savior!

Winterfest

I just got back from a wonderful trip. I went to Winterfest in Gatlinburg, TN. For those of my high school friends, you will remember these trips. I always enjoyed going as a teen. As an adult, I enjoy it even more. I always look forward to the worship time. This is my 2nd year as a chaperone and I love it! Jeff Walling was the speaker and Jerome Williams led the worship. WOW!! It was amazing. I always coem back with a fresh perspective and the teens are on fire for the Lord after this trip. We took 65 people and it was a great weekend. We had no discipline issue and we had 2 baptisms.

As I sat during one of the services, I sat back and thought about how encouraging it was to see that many teens fired-up for the Lord. It then made me reflect on what heaven will be like. In our service, we had 6,000 people. The other service had just as many. The sound of the song service was amazing. Oh, it makes me long for the day when that is what my eternal life will be. I hope that Winterfest still exist when Todd is in school so that he can experience that feeling of pure joy worshipping our Father.

Valentine Gift

Last year, I got my mom a necklace by a company called Pandora. It is like a modern charm bracelet concept. You buy a chain and add different beads. I talked to my brother and dad and they went in on it too. We all picked out charms that reminded us of mom.

I loved the concept of these necklaces but did not get one for myself. However, after the miscarriage, I went and bought myself one. I bought a ring of hearts, a little boy, and the charm pictured in this post, Angel of Hope. Ever since then, for any occasion, Brad and Todd pick out charms for me. I love seeing what they pick out. Usually it is Todd's choices with Daddy's leading. It has become so exciting to see what I will add next. This holiday they got me a strawberry, a heart with a pink stone, and a rose. Some day I will have to post a picture of the necklace. It is so much fun to add to and I get comments on it a lot! I hope all of you have a great Valentine's Day, too!

Believe

I debated back and forth whether to post this information. However, I decided the prayers would comfort me. Brad and I just found out that we are expecting a baby! I am just over 4 weeks so it is very early. I am excited but scared. As you all know, back in August we lost a baby girl. I know that God is in control and I want him to be. However, in my mind, I do not want to endure a heartbreak again. Please keep us in your prayers. I will go to the Dr. on March 5th I believe. (Good sign that I can't remember and I just made it on Tues. :) Last time, we had already had the miscarriage by that time. Please keep us and this baby in mind. If you live around here, Todd DOES NOT know. We will tell him after that visit if things are ok. Please do not say anything around him. He is very in tune to adult's conversations. I know that God will protect us. I know He has a plan. I also know as painful as the miscarriage was, He is the one that sees the final plan. I have to believe that His will will be done! God is good and He is faithful. Though we do not understand His ways at times, He is the only way I want to go!

Happiness

I have a little girl that I teach that I think is precious. She comes in EVERY day smiling and leaves EVERY day smiling. She has a bounce in her step when she walks. She thinks I am the greatest. She has become my "side kick" according to many teachers because she is with me a lot. She is a hard worker and is just pleasant to be around. Her innocence is refreshing. She has struggles but at this point, she doesn't know it.



Secretly, I wish I was like that! I wished I was happy all of the time. I wished I had a bounce in my step and an innocence that was so appealing. I was thinking about this and then I realized that I should be that way. Christ came to this Earth and died for me! Why am I not that happy. Why do I not tell everyone how great my "Teacher" is? Perhaps, if I felt that way about my "Teacher", I would be that happy. So, I am going to strive to have my student's outlook on life! I will bet that I will be that happy, too!

Evolution of Dance

My friend, Jeni, posted this to her website. I thought it was so funny that I would post it on mine. I needed a lighter post! Hope you enjoy it. My favorites from my childhood were 1).Vanilla Ice (I use to do gymnastics routines to it!)
2). The Brady song. Yeah, real sad that I use to know that whole routine.
3). Michael Jackson- I till have the record. Boy, that sounds old!

So, which one brings back good or bad memories for you?

Every Saturday

As you know, it was 2 weeks ago today (Saturday) that I received a phone call that a dear friend of mine had passed away at the age of 33. This has been a difficult situation. It is case like this that we have to have faith that God knows best and that He is the ultimate authority in our lives. I know all of this to be true, but still occurrences like this take a part of your security and comfort. It makes you realize that we are only here temporarily and that this world is not our home. It makes us realize even more that we do not think in God's time.

As I was driving somewhere the other day, I heard a christian song I had never heard. I listen to this genre almost exclusively and had never heard this song. I assumed it was a new release. No, it isn't but the timing for me could not have been better. I have clung to the words of this song since the day I heard it. I have posted a link to hear it, but I am including the words.

As I read the words, I am reminded on many times in my life I was barely hanging on and felt so empty. During those times, I had to know that God was in control and believe in Him. I hope you all can get something from this song, as well. I am sure we all have had times that we were trying to "figure God out". I am also sure we have had times where we blamed God for our pain or question Him. This song sums up some of those thoughts for me. I hope you enjoy.

Every Saturday by Seventh Day Slumber


Saturdays have never been the same
And I still can't believe you're gone
So many things I wish that I could say
I guess the hardest part of moving on
Are these memories that have overtaken me
Once again I'm right here on my knees

I'm barely hanging on
With all these empty feelings
I'm hurting in so many ways
And though I can't begin to understand the reason
I still believe that you're GOD

Saturdays have never been the same
That moment keeps repeating in my mind
The ringing phone
A call that changed my world
An emptiness that words cannot define
All these memories have overtaken me
So once again I fall upon my knees

And as you cried I cried with you
I'll never leave
I'll carry you through
Can't you see that I was always there?
These ashes of pain will fade

I'm barely hanging on
With all these empty feelings
I'm hurting in so many ways
And though I can't begin to understand the reason
I still believe that you're GOD
I'm barely hanging on
With all these empty feelings
I'm hurting in so many ways
And though I can't begin to understand the reason
I still believe that you're GOD


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Xqz3XYGQHwY- Here is the link to the song if you want to hear it.